Sex trafficking examples often involve children being kidnapped and taken across national borders. But what if the most common sex trafficking examples are closer to home?
A husband filming his wife in the shower without her knowledge or consent, and selling the video online.
A boyfriend coercing his seventeen-year-old girlfriend for photos.
A man prostituting his long-time partner, then gaslighting her into feeling guilt and shame so that she feels unable to escape or press charges.
All sex trafficking includes emotional abuse. To see if you’re experiencing emotional abuse, take our free emotional abuse quiz.
What Does A Sex Trafficking Example Look Like?
It’s a depraved trap of psychological, emotional, sexual, and physical coercion and abuse. It’s the disempowerment of women and children. And it’s all around us. There are countless sex trafficking examples.
Dr. Stephany Powell from NCOSE is on The FREE Betrayal Trauma Recovery Podcast with Anne Blythe M.Ed. to cover when a husband is the perpetrator. And give sex trafficking examples.
If you discover your husband is participating in sex trafficking by using pornography, attend a BTR.ORG Group Session today.
Sex Trafficking: Force, Fraud, Coercion
Coercion can include:
- Threats (subtle or overt)
- Gaslighting
- Blame-shifting
- Manipulation
- Emotional withholding
- Financial abuse
- Spiritual abuse
- Sexual blackmail
- Abusive persistence
Transcript: Real Life Sex Trafficking Examples
Anne: I have Dr. Stephanie Powell on today’s episode. She is Vice President and Director of Law Enforcement Training and Survivor Services at the National Center on Sexual Exploitation. Dr. Powell gained insight into sexual exploitation and trafficking through her 30 years with the Los Angeles Police Department, coupled with her passion for education and her heart for community.
She’s an incredible leader who uses her considerable skills and insight to educate the community about the complex and often misunderstood world of sex trafficking. And to create positive change for victims. She’s a powerful speaker, tenacious educator, advocate for change, and one of the premier experts in this field. She’s been featured on CNN, HLN, and local media in the Los Angeles area. We will be talking about sex trafficking examples. Welcome, Dr. Powell.
Dr. Powell: Yes, thank you so much for having me.
Anne: On social media, we saw a post from Fight the New Drug, where you talked about how sex trafficking is not only when victims are held against their will, and a lot of people don’t understand that. So can you start with the definition of sex trafficking?
Dr. Powell: Well, when we talk about sex trafficking, it needs to be understood that when you’re under the age of 18, and someone has used you for commercial sex, that by age alone, you’re automatically considered a victim of trafficking.
In a court of law, if you’re over 18 years of age, you have to prove fraud or coercion. I think what happens oftentimes is that people only think of trafficking victims with the force and the fraud, because sometimes that coercion piece is a little hard to understand because people go, well, why didn’t they just leave?
Emotional Bonds In Trafficking
Dr. Powell: What needs to be understood is that there is an emotional bond that one may have with their trafficker. So that emotional bond may be because their trafficker was a boyfriend or family member. It’s like brainwashing. I’m coercing you because if you leave, something bad will happen to somebody you love. And by the way, this is your fault anyway, because you chose to do this. So that’s what human trafficking looks like. And sex trafficking examples look like.
Someone can enter at the age of 11 or 12, but someone can also enter at the age of 21. It’s not so much where people will think it only happens with children. It happens with adults.
Anne: When you say any commercial sex act of someone younger than 18, that age automatically says this is a victim of trafficking. Could that be perhaps a boyfriend and a girlfriend? Let’s say they’re 17. Let’s say he’s got a camera, and then he records her and posts it online without her knowledge. Under any circumstances, if she’s under 18, is that a commercial sex trafficking example?
Dr. Powell: It could be considered a commercial sex act if they’re getting money by the posting, but by the mere posting of itself and they’re under the age of 18, you’re looking at child pornography.
Anne: Right, child sex abuse material.
Dr. Powell: Yes.
Anne: So do you find that some children under 18 unknowingly participate in trafficking? They don’t realize what is going on?
Dr. Powell: Yes, under the age of 18, they could be unknowingly participating in, child sexual abuse material.
The Dangers Of Sharing Images
Dr. Powell: So that’s why when I talk to teenagers, I tell them, if you’re sharing pictures that you wouldn’t want to share with your grandmother, once you push send, you don’t have any control over that picture. The person who told you they would not share it with anybody else could possibly share it with somebody else. So unfortunately, that image has gone viral.
Anne: And they can also post it without your consent or without your permission anywhere online for non commercial or commercial purposes.
Dr. Powell: Exactly. And then the scary part is that once it goes to one source, other sources can scrape it off, and that’s how it ends up going viral. The image could now be on different social media sites.
Anne: In several cases, I’ve heard of women who are married and their husband records them without their knowledge. And they don’t find this out for sometimes years. Then they also find out that he has been posting these videos of them perhaps in their bedrooms or in their shower online for profit. She has been trafficked in her own home by her own husband. Can you talk more about why this is one of the sex trafficking examples and why it’s so dangerous for women?
Dr. Powell: That photo or video has been used for commercial acts and exploitation. Unfortunately, women may blame themselves. If only I had known. Really, understanding that it’s not your fault. You’ve been exploited. Someone took advantage of you. The worst part, it was somebody they trusted. When it’s somebody you trusted that used you in that way.
Victim Blaming & Self-Worth In Sex Trafficking Examples
Dr. Powell: It’s no different than a victim of trafficking dealing with a trafficker or a pimp. Because many times those women, it was their boyfriend that pimped them out, they got talked into it. The bottom line is, it could make one feel worthless. What I want to say to them is, you did what you were supposed to do. You trusted the person closest to you. You were a wife. And this is no fault of your own. It is something they did. Meaning the husband, that shouldn’t have been done.
Anne: In your experience with the LAPD, did you ever see any cases like this? And if you did, what types of legal ramifications were there for victims when their husband was the trafficker?
Dr. Powell: I have had cases where the husband was the trafficker and he was pimping out his wife.
Anne: Did it make it harder to prosecute when she was married to him? Were there complications due to the relationship?
Dr. Powell: When it is a husband or a boyfriend, there is an emotional bond. Because of that emotional bond, oftentimes women did not want to testify. It’s no different than when you’re dealing with domestic violence. Where they felt that what their husband did to them was wrong. But they don’t want to see them go to jail. They don’t want to see them punished.
And the woman ends up taking the hit, meaning I will sacrifice myself. I’ll just deal with my own pain internally, but I don’t want to see anything happen to him.
Anne: At least from the women I’ve observed, they wonder if he can get better or get treatment and not be that way anymore.
Exploitation & Emotional Manipulation
Anne: So in testifying against it, or even taking the evidence to authorities to have him charged. They don’t want to do that just in case he’s going to get better. Then they can stay married, and their family can stay together. For you feel love toward him. But for him, it was an opportunity to exploit you, and he’s been exploiting you in that way and probably a bunch of other ways.
Perhaps you should consider it an opportunity for exploitation. And maybe talk about what exploitation is in these sex trafficking examples.
Dr. Powell: In this circumstance, the exploitation is that somebody took videos without someone’s knowledge and exploited them by benefiting from it financially. Or share it for comments or whatever it may be. It’s using an individual. Sure, there are women who do not want to see that person go to jail, because they think they might get better. And we’ve all been through something.
It may not be that, but as women, we’ve been through something where we stay with a person and think they’re going to get better.
Anne: Yeah, an example I’ve been using lately is the idea of someone with a severe contagious disease, like Ebola . They’re saying, I want to be in close proximity to you, because I want to ensure that our family stays together. You would be like, you need to stay away from me, because if you’re close to me, I could get this infectious disease. I will interact with you again when you are completely healed and there’s no danger.
The Importance Of Self-Preservation
Anne: Can he get better? That isn’t the question that I think victims should ask or survivors should ask. With Ebola, are they currently safe enough to be in close proximity? Is this person non contagious right now? Not, can they get better? If they’re telling you all the right things, and doing all the right things to groom you and exploit you. That is dangerous for women in these sex trafficking examples.
Dr. Powell: With the Ebola example, it’s not him telling you I’m safe. The idea of it’s safe, not coming from the person who’s infected, because that’s the same person that says, I won’t do this again. And then they do it again. Sometimes we don’t want to hear this, but you got to look out for yourself.
I think we’re taught as women that unconditional love is important to be a wife. You always put your husband first. We got to reserve a little bit of ourself for ourselves. I can’t give you everything and then have nothing of my own.
Anne: Acknowledging that it is your life. It’s your life. Your life is not actually about him. It’s about yourself. And if you choose to share it with him, that’s fine, but you don’t owe him anything. It’s not like your two circulatory systems are combined, and if you get some physical distance from this person, he’s going to drop dead. You are your own person, and this is your life. If you choose to share it with him, it does not necessarily mean he’s become part of you, even though it feels like it.
Recognizing Manipulation & Grooming: Sex Trafficking Examples
Anne: Especially when women separate, and me included, it seemed like I was cutting my own leg off. It felt awful, but I did survive. My circulatory system was not combined with his. You’re the only person who will advocate for your life the way you will, because you’re the only person whose life it is. Especially when your life could be one of the sex trafficking examples.
Dr. Powell: Yeah, absolutely. At the end of the day, you are all that you have. And if you give everything of yourself to a person, when that person walks out the door, they have taken all of you with them. And if you don’t have enough of you to get strength, it’s going to be devastating. I’m not coming from a standpoint of, this is easy. It’s not easy. And it goes back to, you did what you were supposed to do.
In terms of loving and trusting someone you wanted to spend your life with. You did your part. They didn’t do their part. And understanding that, what I think is important, ladies, is you are the prize. Thank you, they messed up, they tried to crush the prize, so at the end of the day, even though you may feel it’s your loss. It really is their loss. And you probably won’t feel this way at first. But you’re going to be fine, because you kept you intact.
In terms of my experience when I first ran my vice unit. I thought when I saw the women walking up and down the street, I assumed they were there because they wanted to be there.
The Reality Of Exploitation
Dr. Powell: But when I started working with them, not only in my law enforcement end. But in the advocate end of it, I quickly learned. These women were doing it because, and I’m going to talk about the ones who felt they had a relationship, because I think people can understand this. I’m talking about the ones who, it was their husbands or their boyfriends. They were in love with them and bought into, I’m doing this for them. I’m doing it for us. They’re in love.
That’s one lesson I learned. Love is a strong emotion that can get people to do almost anything. And we always hear these stories. But it’s so true. Not everybody out there is out there because they choose to be out there in and of itself. You choose to be out there when you don’t have any other choice. But some of them were in love with these guys because they had lost themselves.
In that other person. And so when you see it from that view, it helps you understand from the lens of a woman where there’s that commonality. If you’ve ever been in love and burnt. So I learned that these women were no different from me. We may have made other choices, but when it came to falling in love with the wrong person, they were no different than me.
Anne: They were in that situation due to coercion. Through no fault of their own, through thinking they were doing something for their spouse or their boyfriend. Can you talk about the logic of that? Was it like they needed money? And so he was like, this is a good way for us to get money, babe in these sex trafficking examples?
The Grooming Process
Anne: If you do this, we can earn enough money to buy a house, for me, that doesn’t seem super logical. Could you help put together the pieces of how they would coerce them into thinking that? Being exploited and physically putting themselves in danger, having sex with multiple people for money, what would be of benefit to her.
Dr. Powell: It doesn’t start like that. There’s a grooming process in it, making that person fall in love with them first. A pimp once said, when he meets a girl, he’ll find a weakness. If he can’t find a weakness, he will create one. So, finding that weakness may be that you need someone to tell you that you’re pretty. Or you need to be in a relationship. There’s everything you need. Until, it goes sideways. So they have them fall in love with them first.
And then they broach the idea of, I’ve given you all these things, now I’m running out of money, if you could just do this one time for us. Then that one time becomes two times, it’s not because they want to have sex with all these men. It’s because now they’re in a position where they don’t want that man to leave them. Or if they leave them, that’s what I was talking about, resources. They don’t have anything else, no family, no education and no job.
All being in the name of love. I would assume the same woman who knows their husband watches pornography, and think, eh, I don’t like it. That’s what he does. No harm, no foul until he starts taking pictures of her and uploading it. And she is one of the sex trafficking examples.
Manipulation In Relationships: Sex Trafficking Examples
Dr. Powell: He doesn’t start that way for the most part. It’s that manipulation of gaining trust. Here’s a good example: that guy we fall in love with, and your mother, your family members, and sisters say he’s not the one. And we will argue all the reasons why he’s the one. Until we figure out that he’s not, and then the question becomes, now is it too late? So if you can understand that, you can understand this.
Anne: The grooming is important, because in these sex trafficking examples, that was the trafficker’s intention the entire time. He wanted her to fall in love with him, so that she would be loyal, so that she would be willing to do what he wanted. So that he could exploit her. In that case, her thinking, okay, I’m doing this for us. She does not realize that. It’s never been about “us.” But the grooming occurred to exploit her, and that is how it has always been.
There’s never going to be a time when you earned “enough money” to purchase that car for us. Then he says, Oh, great, I appreciate it. Now that we have our car, we can get decent upstanding jobs. I will go to school, we’ll move into a house with a white picket fence. You never have to do that again. That’s not the end goal they have. She’s chasing peace and being settled, but never getting there. Because that’s not his goal. In the sex trafficking examples, their goal is to make money.
Dr. Powell: Yeah, can you imagine how hurtful that could be? Or, if we’re talking about the situation that maybe some of your listeners are in, when he gets caught. Because he’s uploaded a video.
The Pain Of Realization
Dr. Powell: Then he tells you I’m not going to do it again. You hope and pray that he doesn’t, and you believe him. But when he tells you that he knows he’s going to do it again. He just doesn’t want you to leave, because there might be kids or he might lose half his pension. But he knew when he told you he’s not going to do it again, that he’s going to do it again. He just doesn’t want you to leave.
Anne: Because if you leave, he cannot exploit you anymore.
Dr. Powell: Absolutely.
Anne: Because he groomed you to exploit you in the first place. He’s not going to want you to leave, because then he’ll lose access to exploiting you. From my point of view, and I did this, so this is common. I want all the women listening who have done this, because I’m pretty sure everyone has, to not feel bad. We are trying not to be sex trafficking examples.
When I say this, please take a deep breath and be like, okay, this is what everyone has done. To recognize the things happening and be concerned about it. And then take this list of, hey, it’s not okay that you use pornography. I feel uncomfortable when you scream in my face. I feel uncomfortable that you leave for periods of time, and I’m not sure where you’re going.
And give their abuser a list. What I have seen is that he is like, thank you. I did not know where the loopholes were, didn’t understand where I was not grooming well enough. I appreciate you giving me this list, because now I can groom you by making sure I tell you where I’m going.
Safety & Observation
Anne: Even though I’m lying, I can make sure you never find out I use pornography. It’s basically a list of how to groom me. So when I talk to victims, one of my thoughts is always to say safety is the top priority. Give yourself emotional and psychological space, and observe from a safe distance to see what he’s doing. So we don’t end up as one of the sex trafficking examples.
But you don’t need to tell him. You don’t need to say, hey, I saw you doing this. I’d like you to stop, because then he’d be like, oh, I didn’t realize my mask was cracked. I’m going to make sure to put some super glue right there. So she can’t see through it, but he’s going to continue doing the same things behind the mask.
Dr. Powell: The interesting thing about that is that at the time those conversations are happening, he may not realize what he’s learning. Until he starts to use it, because he knows you so well in the universal you. What’s also interesting about that is aren’t we taught in terms of being in relationships with others that we’re supposed to communicate? It’s almost like a gamble.
I know I’m supposed to communicate. I know I’m supposed to say that when you do this, this hurts me. In the hopes that because I’ve told you, you won’t do it anymore. Not that you’re going to bank it and put it in your toolkit for grooming purposes. So I think it goes back to what we were saying earlier, because we can’t go around life not communicating and then expecting to be in a good relationship, right?
Building Confidence In A Male-Dominated Field: Sex Trafficking Examples
Dr. Powell: So even though I’ve told you that when you do such and such, this hurts me. Now I see that you have now used that against me. I can say, okay, I gave you that information. You used it against me. So that means I need to go. Realizing that regardless of whether we have someone in our life or don’t, we’re going to be okay.
When I was in law enforcement, I came on when there weren’t that many females. And there were a lot of obstacles. But I had this saying on my desk that I actually heard from Oprah Winfrey. It is, what you say about me is none of my business. What you say about me is none of my business. In other words, I can’t invest in that negativity.
Anne: You worked your way up and became a leader in the LAPD, I would love to hear what you learned as a woman in that environment. Would you mind sharing the ways that you built up your own confidence in the face of men who didn’t think you deserved to be there? And seeing the women who were sex trafficking examples.
Dr. Powell: With the Los Angeles Police Department, I joined in 1983, and there weren’t that many women. I was an African American woman, so I was often told I had two strikes against me. I’ll never forget the day I walked into my first police station, and one of the training officers looked at me and he says, you have three strikes against you. You’re black, you’re female, and you’re short.
Overcoming Obstacles In The LAPD
Dr. Powell: And the first thing that popped in my head was, and I said this to him, wow, those are three things I can’t do anything about, but I’m here. Keep in mind, I was like 25 years old. What it taught me was that I can’t do anything about what you think. All I can do is be the best I can be.
What I also realize is that they were afraid of me being female and short. That I would not be able to handle myself in the field dealing with bad guys, and I wouldn’t be able to protect them. And so once I proved that, the issues started to diminish a little bit, but every time I went to another station, it would be the same thing. You know, society has taught us as women that we may not be smart enough or we’re too little. We’re too frail, it’s just like we’re never enough.
And that’s why I keep saying that we have to tell ourselves and our daughters that we are enough. Someone else doesn’t determine whether you are enough. You’ve got to realize that you are enough. And walk into that room with confidence, if it’s a man who wants an equal partnership and wants somebody confident and not afraid of your confidence. That’s what you want. Not someone who’s figuring out a way to manipulate you, and use you as one of the sex trafficking examples.
You know, another thing that I also realize is that sometimes people will stand on top of you to make them taller. And if that’s the case, you need not be that footstool.
Exploitation & Manipulation
Anne: Isn’t that, in a nutshell, the definition of exploitation, using someone else for your own gain? You’re not so concerned about them, but you’re just trying to use them.
Dr. Powell: Absolutely, standing on top of them to make you better. If this has happened to you, it doesn’t mean you weren’t smart enough. You should have seen it. Don’t blame yourself. It’s not because you’re dumb. If anything, it was because you were open enough and vulnerable enough.
And you loved enough that happened. So it’s not you. It’s the person who is doing the manipulating. They’re at fault, not you. So stay who you are. Just know that not everybody deserves your love and openness. You don’t deserve to be one of the sex trafficking examples.
Anne: And you don’t owe it to them either. I mean, many men will give women the impression that because you’re a woman, you owe it to society, to men, to be “nice.” Or to act or look a certain way. I had a man tell me, you’re too cute to be single. And I was like, so my cuteness is for men, apparently? It’s not just for me? So apparently you have to be owned or on someone’s arm to make your cuteness worthwhile?
I can’t just be cute by myself. I found that to be telling of how women should act or what they should be like. Rather than thinking, I don’t need to date even if I am cute. What are you talking about? What does that have to do with anything? Why is it any of your business what I’m doing with my cuteness?
Societal Expectations Of Women: Sex Trafficking Examples
Anne: Women tend to want to be liked, we want to fit in. So using those social norms to coerce us to say, hey, you’re supposed to be service oriented. Rather than realizing that women don’t always have to make choices that sacrifice their own well-being for other people.
Dr. Powell: Yeah, you’re not other people’s property. You’re not. So what if you’re not married? So what if you don’t have a boyfriend? It doesn’t make you any lesser of a person, but society will make it seem that way. You’re cute. Why are you single? What’s wrong with you? There’s nothing wrong with me. I have standards. People have to earn my trust and love. Ladies, I’m no different than you. I am a work in progress.
Many things I’ve learned personally and professionally have been because of bumps and bruises, not in the physical sense. Some of us learn this way. Some of us learn ahead of time. The bottom line is whatever has happened to you. It’s not your fault that you may have been a sex trafficking example. You learn from it, you move forward. But what I want to impress upon everyone is, be you, be your loving self, and just know that not everyone deserves your loving self.
Anne: Thank you so much for taking the time to talk to us today.
Dr. Powell: Thank you so much for having me. I enjoyed the conversation. To everyone listening, stay safe and be well.
I saw a documentary on sex trafficking last year and it was horrifying! From the combination of this podcast episode and the documentary I saw on Youtube, it’s clear that sex trafficking is complex. In the documentary, there was a woman who was taken into sex trafficking by a family friend. He had made friends with her husband and took them on a plane trip away associated with business.
Another woman had answered a job listing to be a maid in a hotel and she had flown from her country so she could have the job. But as soon as she arrived, she was exploited. Many women who go into it “willingly” do so because there are literally no jobs they can find. The money IS coercion. They don’t want to do it, but desperately need money.
I appreciated that Dr. Powell had a law enforcement background. Can she speak to the issues where policemen seem to side with the abuser when they are called, “Hey dude, you know how over-emotional women get.” I watched The Gabby Petito clip on the news and I knew right then the policeman didn’t understand her body language or why she was saying what she was saying – I had been through that.
How do we get the police the extended, appropriate training so that they can discern better when there is abuse? How do we get training to clergy to stop accidentally encouraging women to stay in proximity to an abusive man? And instead help them get to emotional and psychological safety with their children who are also being abused?
I did stay too long because of those things, but decided it didn’t matter what everybody else thought. Even though I was told I would go to hell, I decided I was already in hell and kicked him out after being abused for 25 years. We need religious and civil leaders who understand and care enough about the well-being of women and children to act in a manner to help victims get to safety.