One of the first reactions that women with children have after discovering pornography use is an intense fear that her children have been, or will be, exposed to pornography.
Internet Filters Help, But Boundaries Protect
While internet filters, checking “cookies”, and other technological moves can help women find peace of mind for their children’s internet usage, there are other boundaries that a woman can put in place in her home to ensure that her home is a protected place against pornography.
A Child Being Exposed to Pornography Is Sexual Abuse
If a child views the abuser/sex addict’s pornography, whether by accidental exposure or by choice, that child is a victim of sexual abuse. There is no gray area: that child needs immediate compassionate, professional help. A boundary that a mother can set right away is that upon discovery of his pornography use, her partner must move out of the home immediately so that her children cannot become accidental victims of sexual abuse.
The Truth About Pornography
The pornography industry exists because of exploitation, slavery, rape, and violence. When we teach children the truth about pornography, on whatever maturity level that child can handle, children are more prone to avoid pornography and tell their parents when they have viewed it.
A child who is exposed to pornography by a parent can become severely traumatized and will need professional help. It is essential to help children understand that they are victims of abuse if they have been exposed and NOT “in trouble”.
Boundaries And Pornography
Women have tremendous power in determining how safe their home will be once they know that their partner is using pornography. They should not feel shame or guilt for any exposure that happened before discovery. Women can create and maintain boundaries to protect themselves and their children from the insidious abuse of pornography use.
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I can’t believe how much I needed to hear this. In a way, it’s too hard to hear, like I’m sure it is for most. I don’t know how to be strong enough to move forward with this, but I really appreciate your courage and encouragement and I hope that I can get there. It was an answer to my prayers that I ran into you and you shared with me what you are doing. I just didn’t realize that was the answer until listening to this initial podcast. Now I guess I should pray for the strength to continue with it.
Protecting my son from pornography is one of my highest concerns. I know I cannot control and protect him from being exposed to pornography at some point in his life but I hope to arm him with the tools to know what to do when he does see it. I also know the best thing I can do for him now is to work on myself and become healthy. I have many unhealthy mindsets about myself that have caused unhealthy actions. I am working to change that one day at a time.