If you’re navigating betrayal trauma, know that you’re not alone. Healing and recovery are possible – you can do this.
Intimate betrayal shatters trust.
Whether it’s infidelity, emotional manipulation, secret pornography use, emotional affairs, soliciting prostitutes, or other betrayal, you’re completely justified in feeling that the foundation your relationship was built on, is now broken.
Recovering from Betrayal Trauma is a journey that requires patience, self-compassion, and the right support. But as you commit to loving yourself through this process, healing is absolutely possible.
4 Steps to Recover to Betrayal Trauma Recovery
Acknowledge & Accept Your Feelings
Victims of intimate betrayal often experience a wide spectrum of emotions – tragically, however, they may also experience gaslighting. “You’re making a big deal out of nothing.” “Why can’t you get over this?”
In order to begin healing from Betrayal Trauma, victims need safe space, both emotionally and physically, to acknowledge and accept the many feelings they will likely experience in the aftermath of betrayal.
Feelings may include:
- Grief
- Anger
- Fear
- Apathy
- Relief at finally knowing what’s going on
- Devastation
- Jealousy
Seek Out a Supportive Community
Betrayal trauma can be a very isolating experience. As victims seek healing, it’s important to have a safe community where support, validation, and feelings can be expressed without judgment.
Our BTR.ORG Group Sessions are online, professionally-facilitated spaces where victims can find the support they need on their journey to healing.
Practice Radical Self-Care
Betrayal Trauma can wreak havoc on the mind and body. Many victims report sleep disturbance, digestive issues, mood swings, and trouble focusing at work in the aftermath of discovery.
At BTR, we know that self-care is essential to recovery.
Your basic self-care plan can include simple, daily necessities like:
- Drink 8 glasses of water
- Eat 3 meals
- Take several deep breaths
- Stretch
- Walk around the block
- Journal
- Rest
Establish Boundaries for Emotional & Psychological Safety
Intimate betrayal is, at its core, destroys the sense of safety and security that is so important in an intimate relationship.
In order to function on a basic level, victims can establish safety boundaries to create emotional and psychological safety for themselves as they navigate their post-betrayal journey.
Because intimate betrayal often includes emotionally & psychologically abusive behaviors including gaslighting, chronic lying, sexual coercion, sexual exposure to STIs, financial control, and other behaviors, victims must prioritize their safety above the relationship.
A simple way to establish safety boundaries is to fill in the blank:
I don’t feel emotionally safe when ____.
In order to feel safe, I will take this action: ______.
BTR.ORG Is Here For You
As you work toward healing, remember that you didn’t cause this betrayal. You are a victim, and you deserve loving, compassionate support.
Tune in to The BTR.ORG Podcast to learn more about healing from Betrayal Trauma.
