facebook-pixel "Do I Have Betrayal Trauma?" 26 Symptoms To Help You Know For Sure
Do I Have Betrayal Trauma? 26 Symptoms

Betrayal hurts. Use this list of 26 symptoms to help you determine if you have Betrayal Trauma - and learn your first steps toward healing & emotional safety.

Google Podcasts

“I just found out that my husband’s been having an emotional affair and I can’t stop shaking. What’s happening to me? Do I have Betrayal Trauma?”

Why Does Betrayal Trauma Hurt So Badly?

If you’re experiencing Betrayal Trauma, you may have dealt with emotionally and psychologically abusive behaviors in addition to the betrayal. Behaviors like:

  • Lying
  • Manipulation
  • Gaslighting
  • Financial control & secrecy
  • Sexual secrecy & coercion
  • Verbal abuse

Am I Overreacting or Am I Traumatized?

If you’re second-guessing whether or not you have Betrayal Trauma, take a look at the list of symptoms below, compiled by Dr. Barb Steffens and Marsha Means. Keep in mind that not every victim will experience every symptom. And please remember – it’s normal to be deeply affected by a partner’s betrayal. You’re not crazy or overreacting.

26 Symptoms of Betrayal Trauma

  1. Helplessness
  2. Sleeplessness
  3. Immobility
  4. Reliving the event
  5. Hyper-vigilance
  6. Anxiety
  7. Nightmares
  8. Intrusive images
  9. Withdrawing
  10. Avoidance
  11. Mood swings
  12. Panic attacks
  13. Phobias
  14. Flashbacks
  15. Denial
  16. Over-sensitivity
  17. Depression
  18. Restlessness
  19. Confusion
  20. Dissociation
  21. Inability to eat
  22. Overeating
  23. Rage
  24. Health problems
  25. Chronic fatigue
  26. Immune/endocrine system problems

I Have Betrayal Trauma – What Next?

First and foremost, please offer yourself radical compassion as you come to accept that you’re experiencing Betrayal Trauma. At BTR, we encourage victims to focus on their own safety and wellness as the first priority.

This means that any couple-focused worked is contraindicated as you work toward your emotional & psychological safety.

Choose to Focus on Your Emotional Safety & Wellness

You did not cause your partner to betray you. You cannot control their behavior. And it’s not your job to “teach” them to be loyal and honest. Instead, take this time to shower yourself with self-care. Many women in our community become more grounded and steady as they implement daily self-care routines into their lives, including:

  • Daily hygiene
  • Scheduling reminders to take deep breaths
  • Nutrition & hydration
  • Scheduled rest (for when sleep is difficult)
  • Processing trauma with a safe support network, like our BTR.ORG Group Sessions
  • Scheduled time for learning about betrayal trauma from healthy sources, like The BTR.ORG Podcast
  • “Brain breaks” from learning about betrayal trauma
  • Stretching
  • Journaling

BTR.ORG Is Here For You

At BTR, we know the seemingly endless and daunting devastation of betrayal trauma. The horror of realizing that your life is not what you thought it was. We know the loneliness of waking up next to someone who has broken your heart. We know the anger and bitterness that seems all-consuming. Please know that you are NOT alone. Our Group Sessions are a safe space for you to process these difficult feelings and find a community of women who understand your pain. Attend today and begin your journey to healing.

recovering from betrayal trauma
Have you been lied to? Manipulated?

Discovered porn or inappropriate texts on your husband's phone?
Are you baffled by illogical conversations with him?

Here's What To Do Next

Get the steps we wish EVERY woman had!

Check your inbox for Your Next 3 Steps to emotional peace. Taking these steps can change your life! We'll be with you every step of the way.

Get the Podcast Straight to Your Inbox Every Week

Get the Podcast Straight to Your
Inbox Every Week

Welcome to the BTR Podcast! Keep an eye out for our first email!