No, you’re not crazy.

No, you’re not overreacting.

No, you’re not controlling, abusive, or just really insecure.

You are suffering from betrayal trauma.

What is Betrayal Trauma?

Betrayal Trauma is a collective term for the relational trauma suffered when a person on whom you thought you could rely, a person you trust, violates that trust significantly.

Coach Joi, certified Betrayal Trauma Recovery Coach

So if you’ve been betrayed by your partner, you are probably experiencing betrayal trauma.

Welcome to Betrayal Trauma Recovery; we’re happy you found us and heartbroken you’re here.

Betrayal Trauma is Caused by Abuse

It’s important for you to know that betrayal trauma is not caused by addiction, codependency, or a dysfunctional or unhealthy relationship… it’s caused by abuse. When your partner betrayed your trust, he emotionally abused you. You are a victim of abuse.

And chances are, he wasn’t forthright about the betrayal. Lying is a form of psychological and emotional abuse, too. 

Women who experience betrayal trauma usually uncover that they are victims of sexual coercion, sexual abuse (even marital rape), covert physical abuse, psychological abuse, financial abuse, and spiritual abuse. 

Symptoms Of Betrayal Trauma

If you’re second-guessing whether or not you actually have betrayal trauma, take a look at the list of symptoms below. Not every woman will have every symptom: individuals are unique, and so are their responses to trauma. However, you may find that you are not as alone as you have been feeling in the aftermath of the devastation of betrayal. 

The following list, compiled by Dr. Barb Steffens and Marsha Means, contains some of the symptoms of betrayal trauma. 

26 Symptoms of Betrayal Trauma

  1. Helplessness
  2. Sleeplessness
  3. Immobility
  4. Reliving the event
  5. Hyper-vigilance
  6. Anxiety
  7. Nightmares
  8. Intrusive images
  9. Withdrawing
  10. Avoidance
  11. Mood swings
  12. Panic attacks
  13. Phobias
  14. Flashbacks
  15. Denial
  16. Over-sensitivity
  17. Depression
  18. Restlessness
  19. Confusion
  20. Dissociation
  21. Inability to eat
  22. Overeating
  23. Rage
  24. Health problems
  25. Chronic fatigue
  26. Immune/endocrine system problems

You Deserve Peace and Healing

As a victim of emotional abuse and betrayal trauma, you deserve peace and healing. Women suffering from the effects of abuse and betrayal trauma can find healing, but first they must get to safety. 

What is Safety and How Do I Get It?

At BTR, we believe that every woman deserves physical, emotional, spiritual, and sexual safety: always. When you are walking on eggshells, verbally abused, never sure if you’ll get the nice or the mean version of your partner, afraid of going to bed because you don’t know if you’ll be coerced into sex, afraid that you’ll find pornography on your partner’s phone…

You aren’t safe. 

You can seek safety through setting and maintaining effective boundaries

Effective Boundaries Protect Women From Emotional Abuse

Boundaries are not statements, requests, or ultimatums. They are courageous actions that women take to separate themselves and their children from abusive behavior. 

BTR Supports Victims of Abuse

Navigating boundaries can be difficult, and BTR provides a plethora of resources to help women as they begin their journey to healing with the first and most important step: getting to safety through setting boundaries. 

One way we can help is by providing a safe place to share. With more than 15 sessions a week, it’s easier than ever to find a Betrayal Trauma Recovery Group session that fits your schedule without having to leave your home. Each session is led by a Certified Betrayal Trauma Specialist.

Tune in to the free BTR podcast, where you will hear stories of triumph over and trauma and abuse by fellow survivors. 

Remember, you are not alone. 

9 Steps Checklist

The checklist we wish EVERY WOMAN experiencing betrayal trauma had

Subscribe to download the printable 9-step checklist with ACTIONABLE steps you can take TODAY.

Check your inbox for the checklist from Anne from Betrayal Trauma Recovery. We know this checklist can change your life, just like it's changed the lives of thousands of other women!