Have you wondered if God doesn’t actually hate divorce?
Many within faith communities face the additional challenge of religious teachings that seem to discourage seeking emotional safety. It’s often said, “God hates divorce,” but these teachings can ignore a woman’s need for emotional safety in her own home.
The Idea That God Hates Divorce Harms Victims Of Abuse
Teachings such as “God hates divorce,” “divorce ruins families,” and “women should submit to their husbands” create environments where women are conditioned to endure abuse rather than seek emotional safety.
The result is a harmful cycle where women remain trapped in abusive situations, feeling unsupported and isolated.
When They Told Me “God Hates Divorce” I Heard “God Hates You“
I was one of those women. My name is Anne, and like many, I found myself married to a man who continually lied to me and manipulated me. For years, I was terrified of his anger episodes, but I wanted to do what was right. Due to my religious upbringing, I felt divorce wasn’t what God wanted me to do.
One night, during a particularly difficult moment, I found myself praying fervently, “God, I want a peaceful, happy life; please guide me and direct me toward that.” I realized that my safety and well-being were as important to God as preserving a marriage. It was a turning point that began my path to deliverance.
If God Hates Divorce, Why Is Christ The Deliverer?
Across various religious texts, deliverance is a recurring theme, suggesting God’s aim is to help liberate those how are oppressed and suffering. This became my focus—believing that God wanted me to feel emotionally safe and cherished in my own home.
Then I started BTR.ORG Group Sessions, a supportive community that helped me process my emotions and experiences.
Does God Want Me To Be Abused?
Absolutely not. The notion that God desires anyone to remain in harm’s way contradicts the fundamental teachings of love and compassion found in most faiths. Yet, many faith leaders fail to acknowledge the misogynistic underpinnings of certain doctrines. Instead of being asked, “Were you actually treated like you were valuable?” I was often told to endure my circumstances.
Understanding The General Lack of Self-Worth Among Women
The indoctrination many women experience is not only harmful but erodes self-worth, convincing women they are powerless. This bedrock of misogyny goes unchallenged in too many places of worship, leaving women questioning their value.
Separating Ourselves From Abuse
Learning how to set boundaries and take strategic steps toward emotional safety allowed me to separate from the abuse—both emotionally and physically. My faith tradition claimed it did “not tolerate abuse,” yet offered no real solutions to escape it. With BTR.ORG’s support, I discovered the truth about my situation.
My Faith Tradition Says We Do Not “Tolerate Abuse”
This statement, often repeated, became hollow when not accompanied by action. Without tangible support, it felt like a hollow promise. But with the right resources, I learned to live in truth, free from coercion and fear.
How Have I Maintained My Religious Beliefs?
I have maintained my religious beliefs by focusing on deliverance from oppression, which is thoroughly supported by scripture.
Through prayer and community support, I reinforced my belief in a compassionate, loving deity who didn’t want me to suffer abuse. This understanding was liberating—it allowed me to reclaim my faith and my life.
Abusive Husbands Don’t Want Their Victims To Find BTR.ORG
Because organizations like BTR.ORG empower women with knowledge and support. They help women discover the truth—that they deserve to live in peace and safety.
If you’re experiencing similar challenges, know that you are not alone. At BTR.ORG, we understand how hard it can be to reconcile deep-seated teachings with the need for safety and independence. Join us for a group session today and take the first step toward reclaiming your life.
Women deserve to feel valued, safe, and free from abuse—with or without religious teachings that support their well-being. It’s time for faith communities to recognize the damage caused by abusive indoctrination and offer real support for those in need. If you’re ready to explore your path to freedom, attend a BTR.ORG Group Session TODAY.
While praying for clarity and guidance one day, the book of Jude from the New Testament came to mind. I was unfamiliar with this book as it contains only one chapter. I turned to Jude and found so much clarity and felt great reassurance that my decision to “separate myself” from wickedness was correct and validated by God.
Thank you for all you do and share. I, too, am struggling with faith. This podcast/transcript hit some of my issues.