Unlike therapy, with guided meditation you do not need to give a response. Essentially the work is done within your own mind, your own consciousness, and within your own imagination. Here at Betrayal Trauma Recovery, we have an amazing coach who specialized in guided meditation and shares her insight, talents, and training with us to help women heal the scars of abuse and trauma. Peggy shares some of her tips for having a successful guided meditation session: 

5 Steps To A Successful Guided Meditation Session

  1. Go to a comfortable location.
  2. Preferably, close your eyes.
  3. If you feel like you don’t like closing your eyes for whatever reason you can just look down.
  4. Try sitting up in a chair in a way that makes you very comfortable.
  5. Clear your mind as the session begins. 

As Peggy explains,

“One of the principles that this particular meditation shows us is that when we can imagine something, and we change what it looks like or change the feeling of it and the senses of it, it shifts something deep inside of us. We are talking to the non-conscious mind in the language of the non-conscience. It’s really easy and relaxing. When you find yourself in a nice comfortable position, I just want you to start to notice and feel your back against the chair or couch or the bed. Now notice your breath; in and out.”

“Just allow yourself to breathe a little deeper now and just know that with every breath you take and with every sound you hear, including the sound of my voice, that it will help you to become more and more relaxed now. Perfect.”

“I want you to just think of a challenge or a problem that you may be facing right now. This might be a stressful relationship, maybe there is a specific part of that relationship that’s challenging, there might be fear coming up around making money. It could be really be anything. It might be self-care and how you’re not doing it.”

What Is Guided Meditation?

Peggy is going to guide us through one of her guided meditations: 

“Just imagine a challenge or a problem and imagine that a part of you believes that this will be difficult to resolve so we’re going to imagine that part of you that believes that this will be difficult to resolve. We think of a part of you that is confused, un-resourceful, negative, dark, or even hopeless. 

“Okay, now closing your eyes, see that part that’s un-resourceful, negative, dark or even hopeless in your left hand. If you can’t see it clearly just imagine it or pretend that you can see it, and then see it. Now give a color to that part and see the color of that part and give a shape to that part and see the shape of that part. See the brightness or dullness of that part, and now hear the sound that part makes and the words that part has to say to you. Listen to that part telling you the benefits it gives you, and if you can’t think of any benefits just consider the possibility that its benefit may be to protect you from something. Now, close your left hand.”

“Now, just get a sense of how you will feel when this challenge is successfully resolved or access the part of you that knows it is already healed and whole or can heal itself or access the part of you that is light. Now see this part in your right hand. Again, see the color of this part and if you can’t see the color just imagine what color it might be. See the shape of this part and see the brightness of this part.”

“Now, hear the sounds of this part or the words it has to say to you. From this best part of you listen to this part telling you the benefits it gives you. Perfect, and as you close your hand around this part, feel these benefits and wonderful feelings in your whole body, and just rest in these feelings for a few moments.”

“Now as you open your right hand again, choose at least 3 more resourceful states or emotions. These are resourceful states or emotions that you would like and add them to your right hand. You could choose confidence, certainty, courage, self-love, unconditional love, creativity, joy, self-esteem, lightness source or any other resourceful state or emotion that you’d like. So, choose at least 3 more resourceful states or emotions and just add them all to your right hand. You can add as many as you want.”

What Does Guided Meditation Do?

“And now see this enhanced empowered part in your right hand. See the color of this part now. See the shape of this part and hear the sounds of this part and the words it has to say to you. And listen to this enhanced strengthened part telling you the benefits it gives you. Listen to it telling you the benefits it gives you.”

“As you close your hand around this part feel these benefits and wonderful feelings permeating your whole body, your whole being. Just rest in these beautiful feelings for a few seconds.”

And with your eyes open or closed just open your right hand again, with all of these beautiful resources, and now open your left hand with that challenge. Now, just being pouring all the contents from your right hand with the wonderful feelings and resources into your left hand. As you keep pouring, see the color change, see the shape change. The brightness might change. Hear the sounds change as the light integrates with the dark. 

Feel the changes inside your body now as this happens. Really just enjoy these feelings inside your body and take a nice deep breath in. (Inhale/Exhale) Great. 

Now look at your left hand and see the color, the shape, the brightness and ask what your left hand has to say about the benefits of integrated parts and how you feel about this integration. Great. 

Now, step into the future 10 days. Just image yourself 10 days from now and see and hear and feel how you’re dealing with this former challenge from the place of being fully integrated and whole. Deriving the full benefits of a wholesome and integrated self. Wonderful. 

Take a nice deep breath in and let it out, and now gently come back to the present time, and when all parts of you are fully integrated in the knowledge that this healing, this change, this integration can continue to enhance itself perfectly and naturally on its own accord without you having to think or do a thing. 

You may open your eyes now when you are ready.”

 

Guided Meditation Can Be Empowering

Guided meditation can be healing and empowering. It can cause shifts that are unnoticeable at first or shifts that are huge and felt right away. As Peggy suggests,

In an individual process, if you get stuck I get to work with you on it and we get to figure out what that is. We might go into the feelings, what it feels like. There are just all kinds of tools that I can use to help you access this deeper part of you. So, if this is your first introduction to something like this and nothing happened, no problem, we just need to work together.”

If you are interested in that individualized experience where you can talk with Coach Peggy by yourself and have her guide you through your own personal meditation we recommend that you do 2 back-to-back sessions. You can schedule two 50-minute sessions back-to-back and spend an hour and 40 minutes with Coach Peggy, that way you have enough time to talk about what the issue is, go through an entire meditation process, and then talk afterward about how the process went for you. A 12-session package works great because then you will receive 6 back-to-back sessions with her.

Betrayal Trauma Recovery Group can be a wealth of information and support for women who need it now. Building a community of support is so important and vital in helping you find safety and peace.

We are a non-profit organization that educates on how pornography is abusive and helps encourage women to achieve safety in domestic abuse situations. We operate on donations and because of this, we are so appreciative of your monthly donations that contribute to our ability to provide fantastic free material, such as our podcast, the shareable articles, the BTR ChecklistBTRG, and the free peer support group on Facebook.

Until next week, stay safe out there.

Full Transcript:

Welcome to Betrayal Trauma Recovery, this is Anne.

We have been talking with Coach Peggy for the last 2 weeks. She is a certified Journey Practitioner and she is a coach here at Betrayal Trauma Recovery. I personally go to her to do meditation sessions. She is amazing.

If you have not heard the last 2 weeks of podcasts, please go back and start 2 weeks ago so that you have the background on Coach Peggy’s personal story and how Journey Work guided meditation works. 

So, today we’re going to do an actual guided meditation with you. Now this is different then what you would get in Betrayal Trauma Recovery Group and in an individual session because she is not going to be eliciting a response from anybody because if we did one with me and I said “Oh, a giant marshmallow showed up” and you guys who were also meditating would be like: “What? No, I saw a bird, or I saw a truck or whatever.” So, we didn’t want everybody to get confused by me voicing the mediation, so Coach Peggy chose a specific type of guided meditation that does not require a response so that this will work for everyone listening today.

I’m going to turn the time over to Coach Peggy to start this meditation with all of us and then we’ll talk about it after it’s done. 

Peggy: Great, thank you, Anne.

Guided Meditation Can Help To Heal Wounds

This is going to be a guided meditation, like Anne said, that you will not have to give me a response. I would like for you to make sure though, that you are not driving. Preferably, this works better if you can close your eyes. If you feel like you don’t like closing your eyes for whatever reason you can just look down. Preferably sitting up in a chair, very comfortable. So, find yourself a comfortable position and then we’ll get started.

One of the principles that this particular meditation shows us is that when we can imagine something, and we change what it looks like or change the feeling of it and the senses of it, it shifts something deep inside of us. We are talking to the non-conscious mind in the language of the non-conscience. It’s really easy and relaxing. 

This will not be as effective as an individual session because it will be shorter and there won’t be any responses from you and it just won’t take you as deep as we can do in an individual session, but you’ll get a feeling for it and get a sense of what this is, which is what we want to do. It will create some shifts in you and you may or may not notice them, but we’ll have some fun here. 

So, what I’d like you to do is when you find yourself in a nice comfortable position, I just want you to start to notice and feel your back against the chair or couch or the bed. Now notice your breath. That’s it, that’s great. 

Just allow yourself to breathe a little deeper now and just know that with every breath you take and with every sound you hear, including the sound of my voice, that it will help you to become more and more relaxed now. Perfect.

I want you to just think of a challenge or a problem that you may be facing right now. This might be a stressful relationship, maybe there is a specific part of that relationship that’s challenging, there might be fear coming up around making money. It could be really be anything. It might be self-care and how you’re not doing it.

Guided Meditation Can Help With Trauma

Just imagine a challenge or a problem and imagine that a part of you believes that this will be difficult to resolve so we’re going to imagine that part of you that believes that this will be difficult to resolve. We think of a part of you that is confused, un-resourceful, negative, dark, or even hopeless. 

Okay, now closing your eyes (if you haven’t already) see that part that’s un-resourceful, negative, dark or even hopeless in your left hand. If you can’t see it clearly just imagine it or pretend that you can see it, and then see it.

Now give a color to that part and see the color of that part and give a shape to that part and see the shape of that part. See the brightness or dullness of that part, and now hear the sound that part makes and the words that part has to say to you. Listen to that part telling you the benefits it gives you, and if you can’t think of any benefits just consider the possibility that its benefit may be to protect you from something. Now, close your left hand. Good. 

Now, just get a sense of how you will feel when this challenge is successfully resolved or access the part of you that knows it is already healed and whole or can heal itself or access the part of you that is light. Excellent.

What Can Guided Meditation Do For Me?

Now see this part in your right hand. Again, see the color of this part and if you can’t see the color just imagine what color it might be. See the shape of this part and see the brightness of this part. Great.

Now, hear the sounds of this part or the words it has to say to you. From this best part of you listen to this part telling you the benefits it gives you. Perfect, and as you close your hand around this part, feel these benefits and wonderful feelings in your whole body, and just rest in these feelings for a few moments. That’s it, great.

Now as you open your right hand again, choose at least 3 more resourceful states or emotions. These are resourceful states or emotions that you would like and add them to your right hand. You could choose confidence, certainty, courage, self-love, unconditional love, creativity, joy, self-esteem, lightness source or any other resourceful state or emotion that you’d like. So, choose at least 3 more resourceful states or emotions and just add them all to your right hand. You can add as many as you want. 

How Does Guided Meditation Work?

And wow, now see this enhanced empowered part in your right hand. See the color of this part now. See the shape of this part and hear the sounds of this part and the words it has to say to you. Ahhh, listen to this enhanced strengthened part telling you the benefits it gives you. Listen to it telling you the benefits it gives you. 

Beautiful, and as you close your hand around this part feel these benefits and wonderful feelings permeating your whole body, your whole being. Just rest in these beautiful feelings for a few seconds. Fabulous. 

And with your eyes open or closed just open your right hand again, with all of these beautiful resources, and now open your left hand with that challenge. Now, just being pouring all the contents from your right hand with the wonderful feelings and resources into your left hand. As you keep pouring, see the color change, see the shape change. The brightness might change. Hear the sounds change as the light integrates with the dark. 

Feel the changes inside your body now as this happens. Really just enjoy these feelings inside your body and take a nice deep breath in. (Inhale/Exhale) Great. 

Why Is Guided Meditation Helpful For Trauma?

Now look at your left hand and see the color, the shape, the brightness and ask what your left hand has to say about the benefits of integrated parts and how you feel about this integration. Great. 

Now, step into the future 10 days. Just image yourself 10 days from now and see and hear and feel how you’re dealing with this former challenge from the place of being fully integrated and whole. Deriving the full benefits of a wholesome and integrated self. Wonderful. 

Take a nice deep breath in and let it out, and now gently come back to the present time, and when all parts of you are fully integrated in the knowledge that this healing, this change, this integration can continue to enhance itself perfectly and naturally on its own accord without you having to think or do a thing. 

You may open your eyes now when you are ready. 

Congratulations! 

Anne: Thank you.

Is Guided Meditation Different For Everyone?

Let’s start with my experience and then talk for anyone who is just kind of like: “I don’t know what’s going on here. This isn’t really working for me.”

So, for me in my left hand, I imagined it was a dark sort of charcoal, extremely sharp triangle (like a pyramid) and if I closed my hand on it, it would kind of cut me. It was made of a razor blade. It was really, really intense and very dark and very scary. I didn’t like that.

Then in my right hand, I imagined a glowing orb. It really didn’t have a shape, but it was sort of in the shape of a circle. It was like the sun with fusing tons of light and energy and creation and beautiful things. 

In the end, when I poured the glowing orb type thing over the razor blade pyramid thing, it sort of melted it like lava and it kind of ran down over my hand and just sort of went into the ground and the ground absorbed it. So, it was gone, and in the end, I didn’t even have that razor blade pyramid. Then I felt 10 days later that I felt lighter, I felt more at peace. I felt happier. 

Some of the resources that I asked for were courage, peace, love but it just felt very creative where I could actually start working toward and creating the life that I chose rather than feeling stuck and tied down to someone else’s bad choices. 

So, that’s kind of how I felt with my process. I would love to know what you guys felt. Please go to our website, BTR.org, if you felt a shift or describe what you saw in our comments on this episode. That would be awesome. I want to know what you guys thought about it.

Peggy, what advice do you have or what feelings do you have for women who didn’t see anything or didn’t feel anything. They’re kind of feeling like: “You know, I don’t really get this. Why does Anne like this so much or what is Peggy even talking about?” For women who had an experience like that, they were kind of like: “Eh,” do you have any thoughts for them?

How Does Guided Meditation Promote Healing?

Peggy: Yes, and first of all good job Anne. You did a great job on your process. 

Yes, if you’re not familiar with this kind of work, let’s say you have a hard time visualizing or something, then we need to work together. It’s possible to do this and it’s very powerful. Think about it. Everybody dreams, and when we go into this lower alpha/upper theta state, that is like the dream state. Everybody dreams. You can do this! That just means we need to work individually, and we need to access that, and there are tools that I have that can access that. 

We may have to start with figuring out what your primary sense is, and I have a meditation for that. You can actually increase your skills to visualize, and I can teach you how to do that. 

In an individual process, if you get stuck I get to work with you on it and we get to figure out what that is. We might go into the feelings, what it feels like. There are just all kinds of tools that I can use to help you access this deeper part of you. So, if this is your first introduction to something like this and nothing happened, no problem, we just need to work together. 

Anne: I couldn’t agree more. I think that this, for me, is so powerful. I have become, and Peggy you can tell me if I’m wrong, very honest about the way that I meditate. If I am in a session with Peggy and I see a giant hot dog, which has not happened before but let’s pretend, and I’m a little bit embarrassed to be like: “Oh, this is embarrassing. I did not want a giant hot dog to appear.” Peggy is so safe that I say: “Well, there’s a giant hot dog. This is what it looks like.” It’s such a safe space, the more honest I am the deeper I’m able to go and I love the creative process. I love seeing what shows up. 

In fact, I want to tell them about my son. So, Peggy came over and did a session with my son and he was envisioning all of his negative emotions as mud, the mud was around his feet, and she said: “Who can help you clean this mud up?” and he was talking about the Lego movie because he loves the Lego movie and so he mentioned Emette and his friends, and she said: “Okay, why don’t you go get them and have them come help you” and he said: “Okay, they’ll be here in a minute after they get their over-priced coffee.” (Laughing)

How Can Guided Meditation Help With Abuse?

Peggy: I actually burst out laughing when he said that, and I have never done that before because it was so funny. He and I were having a really great time. It was a really fun, fun thing. In his imagination, which was just fun and funny, and it shifted.

Anne: Yeah. So, the more genuine and honest and vulnerable you can be in these sessions, I think the better they go. If you’re seeing a hot dog or if you’re seeing something that you think: “I really don’t want to say this” like when I had that cotton ball stuck. It was basically stuck in my throat and there was no way around it. The more I pulled on it the more it would just stretch. There was really no way around it and the “right answer” was: “Oh, I can just move it.” But that wasn’t a possibility in that meditation, and so I was able to tell Peggy: “This thing is not moving, I don’t know what to do.” 

We just moved on from that and she just let it stay there and then later was when I got the machine and I was able to move it, and that was totally me. I was like: “Oh, this machine showed up and now I can move it,” but I felt safe enough to just be there, to just do that, and I think that’s part of what has made meditation so successful for me. It’s that ability just whatever pops into my mind to go with that and it’s become this super fun, creative, interesting process where I learn a lot about myself and I’m able to process things that I wouldn’t be able to process just through talking.

If you’ve been listening to this podcast for the last couple of years, you know that I talk a lot. I talk about this all day long, every day and so talking at a therapy appointment or even just talking, in general, is not what helps me progress these days. These days it’s getting inside of myself through Yoga or through meditation in order to process things differently because talking can only get me so far, and I don’t know about the rest of you, some of you might not have ever spoken about it ever so starting to speak about it is where you’re at and that’s really important. 

Guided Meditation Is A Great Tool To Add To Your Healing

I think anybody, and everybody can add meditation and Yoga to their healing repertoire, to their healing first aid kit, in order to aid them in their healing process. 

Peggy: The thing about the cotton ball and the hot dog is I trust that. I trust that something inside of you is bringing that up, and that’s what we trust. We trust your body, we trust your psyche. There is a reason for it, so when you let go of a cotton ball and say: “Okay, we’ll just see what happens” it’s not me running the process it’s Anne or it’s you. So, Anne had this illusion but by the time we were done it all worked out and she had what she needed to deal with that. 

I don’t know why the cotton ball showed up. I can guess, but it’s you that has the answers, which is what I love about this work. This is the answers inside of you. You have this beautiful whole, already healed being inside of you. We’re just accessing that when we do these processes. 

Anne: Yes. If you are a member of Betrayal Trauma Recovery Group and you have not been to one of Peggy’s sessions, I highly recommend giving it a try and don’t just try it once. Try it a few times. I also really encourage you to set up one of these double appointments that I’m telling you about where you do 2 back-to-back 50-minute sessions with Peggy to have an individual experience. Where you can describe what you’re individually going through and get individual feedback to take you through your process.

It has helped me more than anything and I will be scheduling another back-to-back meditation session with Peggy as soon as we get off this podcast because this is what helps me right now and that is why I wanted to provide it here at Betrayal Trauma Recovery. I’m so glad I found someone who is not only extremely skilled at this work but also comes at it with a lifetime of experience and knowledge about what we are going through. You are one of us, and I am one of us. 

I’m so grateful to have Coach Peggy on the Betrayal Trauma Recovery Coaching team. She is an amazing asset. I really encourage everyone to utilize these sessions.

Guided Meditation Is Shown To Help Bring About Mindfulness

Peggy: What I mentioned before is that this is a journey. We are on a journey and you can see a major shift from just one process or maybe you won’t. I recommend for someone that has one specific issue at least 4 back-to-back individual sessions, that would be 8 total, at least 4. You can buy the package of 12, which would give us 6, which is absolutely applicable here. 

When I work with women who are currently in a relationship that is stressful, I really encourage you to do longer than that. We need to be working over a period of time. With the coaching, it’s just really powerful with the shifts and changes that can happen and the awareness that you get and the access to your deeper self. It’s just all around and an incredible asset to you to be doing some ongoing guided meditation, at least for a while. 

Anne: Uh huh, yeah. I agree, and it gives you resources that you can’t really receive, from my perspective, from talking about it. With my self-care issues, I could read a million books about eating vegetables, and I knew I needed to eat vegetables. I could study, and I even got a health coach that would talk to me about my health, and she started really bugging me. I literally couldn’t stand her, and I stopped talking to her because I was like: “This is just so annoying, I can’t stand it.”

But in these coaching sessions, it’s like it got underneath my oppositional disorder or whatever was going on to enable me to access the motivation that I was not able to access just by talking to someone or reading a book. So many women right now in an abusive situation, first of all, sometimes they don’t know it’s happening, so the first thing is you’ve got to know what’s going on: “Oh, this is abuse and this is what it looks like” and then once they know that they know what to do, but doing it is so hard or so scary. Like setting your first boundary or even thinking about a boundary to set because you know “Oh if I set this boundary these serious consequences may or may not happen and I’m scared.”

Can Guided Meditation Help Me?

So, having the inner resources to do very difficult things that may make your situation worse before it gets better is really important. At Betrayal Trauma Recovery we’re trying to provide that holistic network for people so that they have emotional support where they can talk but then through meditation and Yoga really receiving inner resources. So not just external support and external validation but then being able to create your own internal resources and your own internal validation because it’s a tough road first of all getting to safety, and then recovering from the abuse is a long road and you need help. It’s not something that anybody can do by themselves.

Peggy: Right. Yes, absolutely. I’ve been doing Journey Work for 13 years and I still do it regularly for myself. It’s just really a part of my life. I wanted for the women to hear from another woman who’s worked with me over a period of time, and it’s been a couple of years since we worked together, but she is still in an abusive relationship. I’m going to share with you what a woman who worked with me years ago said to me recently about the work we did. 

She said: “What I learned from you and the tools you taught me has been extremely helpful in setting boundaries. The healing work you did with me finally helped me overcome all the pain and hurt inflicted by my husband. I am peaceful and really no matter what he decides to do, I am so good. You have been such a light to me and a blessing in my life.”

I wanted to share that with you because she just contacted me recently and that’s what she told me, and it’s been several years since we worked together. For me to know that the work we did together is still impacting her, that’s powerful stuff. 

Anne: Thank you so much for spending time with us over these last 3 weeks. I’m really excited for women to jump into your BTRG session and also to schedule individual sessions with you. Thank you so much for coming on the episode today Peggy.

Guided Meditation Can Be Useful In Finding Hope

Peggy: Oh, thank you so much. Thanks for having me and giving me the opportunity to share this work that I love so much.

Anne: If guided meditation is something that you’re interested in, go to our website BTR.org. You can join Betrayal Recovery Group and attend Peggy’s group sessions every week as a member of BTRG, which also includes regular sessions where you’re processing through talking and it also includes a Yoga session. 

If you’re interested in that individualized experience where you can talk with Coach Peggy by yourself and have her guide you through your own personal meditation we recommend that you do 2 back-to-back sessions. So, you schedule two 50-minute sessions back-to-back and spend an hour and 40 minutes with Coach Peggy, that way you have enough time to talk about what the issue is, go through an entire meditation process, and then talk afterward about how the process went for you. Like Coach Peggy mentioned, a 12-session package works great because then you’ll get 6 back-to-back sessions with her. That’s what I do, and I love it. I am so grateful for her.

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