Women can feel hurt for years before they realize what’s really happening to them. What is betrayal trauma? It’s the pain and emotional wounds caused by a husband’s cheating. No matter what type of infidelity, this kind of hurt can affect many parts of their lives.
What Is Betrayal Trauma?
Betrayal Trauma is the emotional and psychological trauma that occurs when someone we trust betrays us.
Betrayal trauma happens when a woman is hurt by her husband’s abuse. So this can include emotional, mental, financial, or spiritual harm.
So if you’re experiencing any of the 19 different types of emotional abuse, you’re likely experiencing betrayal trauma. To find out, take our free betrayal trauma quiz.
Betrayal trauma can have long-lasting effects on a woman’s life. It can make you feel angry, ashamed, guilty, anxious, or sad. It can also make you feel like you’re not good enough.
Almost always, betrayal trauma also causes physical problems like headaches, stomachaches, and feeling very tired.
What Causes Betrayal Trauma?
When a husband betrays his wife, like hiding his use of pornography, it’s often just the beginning.
Betrayal trauma happens when a husband hurts his wife emotionally, mentally, or through unwanted sexual pressure, like:
- Gaslighting
- Manipulation
- Financial Abuse
- Lying about sexual behaviors
- Spiritual abuse
- Coercive control
So one of the best ways to learn more about betrayal trauma is to listen to the Free Betrayal Trauma Recovery Podcast.

What are the Physical Symptoms of Betrayal Trauma?
Next, women suffering from Betrayal Trauma will experience it in many ways. Because all women are different, no two women will have the same experience.
Below is a list of some common symptoms of betrayal trauma.
Common Physical Symptoms of Betrayal Trauma
- Fatigue
- Lack of appetite/Constant hunger
- Difficulty sleeping
- Nightmares
- Nerve pain
- Autoimmune disease-like symptoms
- Panic attacks
- Nausea, Vomiting, Diarrhea
- Tremors, Shaking, Shivering
- Unexplained Fever
- Unexplained joint pain
- Pelvic/sexual pain
- Constant infections
- Migraine and/or tension headaches
- Muscle pain/weakness
To learn more about this type of abuse, listen to The Free Betrayal Trauma Recovery Podcast.
What are The Emotional Symptoms of Betrayal Trauma?
Last, betrayal trauma can hurt a woman’s feelings and mind. It makes sense to feel upset and worried after finding out your husband has been lying or being unfair.
Common Emotional and Mental Symptoms of Betrayal Trauma
- Depression
- Anxiety
- Panic and/or Anxiety attacks
- Suicidal ideation
- Inability to focus
- Hyper-alertness
- Reliving traumatic experiences (flashbacks)
- Terror
- Mood swings
- Rage
- Apathy
So if you’re experiencing these symptoms, we’re here to support you. Attend a Betrayal Trauma Recovery Group Session TODAY
How To Heal From Betrayal Trauma
Betrayal hurts deeply, and consequently, leaves women feeling sad and confused. So those who go through it need kindness, support, and understanding as they work through their feelings.
So if you need help healing from betrayal trauma, you’re not alone. Enroll in The Betrayal Trauma Recovery Living Free Workshop to learn your next steps toward peace.
Thank-you for sharing this, Ann. It really resonates with me. I am a Christ Follower/Christian, and I have to keep reminding myself that I can do ALL things through Christ who strengthens me. Philippians 4:13.
I have actually experienced , in my own life, on more than one occasion,what your story teaches…….let go and let God! It’s true! Once I finally reach the point where I cry out, “God, I can’t take this anymore,” that peace that passes all understanding begins to wash over my soul.
One of my favorite hymns is “Be Still my Soul.” It begins with these words; “Be Still my Soul, the Lord is on your side….” Perhaps you know this hymn. If not, I urge you to Google it; the lyrics are so amazingly comforting.
A sister in Christ,
Patty
Explains my week.. and it resonates it with being good shepherd week (Oh How He runs after us!)
I’m so glad it was helpful to you!
Thank you Anne for sharing this. It helped me to realize that I need to remember to relax and know that the healing will come. God is giving me everything I need, I love the part about floating and relaxing and not pushing God away with all my thrashing. Thank you so much for that. I’m learning how to relax again. I’ve gotten my guitar out and begun to play again. I’m remembering there were things I liked to do. I’m getting creative again. I’m remaking my life with the things that make me me! It’s a process and I’m Grateful for it. Some things you can see in no other way. I may not have realized how much of myself I lost over the years of dealing with his addiction had it not all come to a screeching halt. I’m Grateful for the lessons I have learned and the Truth I now see. It’s a difficult journey. He is 3 months sober today but still out of the house going on 6 months now. I’m not willing to go back to the life we had or anything resembling it. Recovery is possible and I’m holding out for a life of recovery that I’ll live with or without him.
Ellen, I’m so glad you found us, and that the podcast was helpful. Hugs!