Many women find themselves torn between the hope that their husband will change and the question, “Should I prepare for divorce?” If you’re grappling with this, you’re not alone. Here are 3 things to consider.
Should I Prepare for Divorce?
If your husband has lied to you and is psychologically abusive, you’re likely clinging to the hope of his transformation. Wishing for change is totally normal. All the women in our community have hoped for our emotionally abusive husband to change.
Preparing for divorce doesn’t signify defeat. Rather, it indicates that you’re taking steps to protect yourself just in case.
One way to know if you should prepare is to listen to The FREE Betrayal Trauma Recovery Podcast where women share stories about when they had to ask themselves this question.
Why Prepare for Divorce if He Might Change?
Preparing for divorce doesn’t automatically mean you’ll follow through. But often abusive men file for divorce out of nowhere, leaving their wife stunned.
If you prepare for divorce, it means that you’re prioritizing your emotional safety in case your husband remains emotionally abusive.
Signs You May Not Need To Prepare For Divorce
- Accountability: Recognizing his actions without deflecting blame.
- Consistent Effort: Showing a long-term commitment to change.
- Empathy: Demonstrating a true understanding of the harm inflicted.
Signs You Need to Prepare for Divorce
- Inconsistency: Frequent apologies followed by repeated harmful behavior.
- Manipulation: Using guilt or pressure to secure reconciliation.
- Lack of Responsibility: Failing to acknowledge the extent of the damage caused.
Steps To Prepare for Divorce (But Not Necessarily Do It)
1. Get Educated About Divorce
Knowledge is power! The Betrayal Trauma Recovery Living Free Workshop can help educate you about basic divorce information before you even consider it.
Take a step back to evaluate your husband’s actions against his words. Is he genuinely remorseful and making efforts to change, or are his promises empty?
2. Profile Your Husband
Hope is a powerful emotion, but it cannot replace the necessity of preparation.
Before you prepare for divorce, you need to know what your husband’s true character is. The Betrayal Trauma Recovery Living Free Workshop will help you see the truth of his character and anticipate what he’s going to do next.
3. Find The Right Emotional Support
Establishing an emotional safety net is essential if you’re considering preparing for divorce.
Consider attending Betrayal Trauma Recovery Group Sessions to get the emotional support you’ll need no matter what decision you make.
4. Rely On Experts in Emotional Abuse
The Coaches at Betrayal Trauma Recovery aren’t just certified divorce coaches, they’re also trauma coaches who can support you through the entire process, but won’t push you to do anything you feel uncomfortable with.
Where can I find the sequel/second part of this podcast? This was Extremely helpful! THANK YOU
Here’s the second one: 4 Things You Need to Survive Divorcing an Emotional Abuser
Thank you
I related to so much of this, but also feel the need to say that the analogy to nazis and death camps made me almost stop listening. Especially during a time where antisemitism is on the rise around the country, this felt like a flippant comparison to the millions of lives lost as a result of the holocaust. I can appreciate the depth of despair felt in the scenario described as someone who is currently living it, but my struggle is nothing compared to the murder and trauma of so many of my people. I hope that this message is taken in the way that it is intended– not to attack, but to inform.